The residents of Wichita Falls, Texas had an unnerving wakeup call late this October. At approximately 6:45 AM on Monday, October 28, mysterious warning sirens described by residents as “apocalyptic” blared through the small city. This was the second time that week that these sirens had gone off with no official explanation. These were not the standard sirens of emergency vehicles many of us have learned to sleep through. These were more like the sirens you’d hear in a bargain bin sci-fi horror movie right before the nukes hit the ground or just after the zombies rise out of it.
Jessica Pichardo recorded footage of the early morning apocalypse trumpets and spoke to Wichita Falls’ News Channel 6. She says:
“I was making some coffee and I just heard a really weird noise. My dog kind of tilted her head and walked over to the door. I just kind of looked out…it was far away at some points and then it sounded like it was closer.
You know, I watch a lot of horror movies. The first thing I was thinking with it being Halloween time was Martial Law or a zombie apocalypse or something like that.”
“Looks like it’s gonna be one of those Mondays.”
Atzhiri Acosta, another Wichita Falls resident also spoke to News Channel 6. She says that she saw one of the tall, pole-mounted sirens outside her house spinning as it was going off. This would suggest that there was some reason for these sirens, but when Acosta called the police they had no idea what was going on. Acosta says:
“I was preparing for my meditation that I do every morning and the siren just went off. I looked to the window, and I see it spinning so I was like freaking out.
Bizarre unexplained sirens induce the exact opposite mental state as morning meditation, so it’s hardly any wonder it threw her off balance.
Trevor the Guru of Cool understands that every moment is its own apocalypse and finds his peace even through the howling klaxons.
Eventually, though, the traffic department did come to a conclusion about the mysterious sirens: slightly bad weather. Not apocalypse bad, just icky. They say that slightly cold and damp weather caused condensation inside the keypads on the sirens, causing them to release a sound no one ever heard them make before. Director of the Transportation Department John Burrus said:
“I can assure everybody that it’s not a zombie apocalypse.”
I don’t know. That’s still exactly what the traffic department in a zombie movie would say right before everything goes sideways.
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